Just days after being notified that my job was coming to an end, on June 6, 2012 I received a call from Mr. Kris Airgood regarding the boMANi Mentoring Project that I had written for a targeted group of collegiate men. I recall telling him that my job was ending and I didn’t know what the status of the project would BE. He asked if he could come to the office and get more information. Well, I sit in my office all day so I suggested that I meet him at his office. The next day, June 7, 2012, I met with Mr. Airgood and gave him the project booklet and we started chatting about my knowledge, skills, and abilities and the needs of his company. So, he asked if I could meet for lunch the next day and I said yes. On June 8, 2012 we met at Olive Garden and again we chatted more about his company’s needs. He asked about my current salary and when I told him what it was, he assured me that they wouldn’t BE able to pay me that much. When he told me how much they could pay me, in my mind I was thinking, “Man, unemployment will probably pay me more than that. What is a girl to do?”
Halfway through the meal, and a server who was all but OVER SERVING US (like I admire that you are doing your job, but can I get in at least three forks full and two sips BEfore you ask how I’m doing ), just somewhere along this conversation, I noticed that his interest was not just “work” or “mentoring” related. (((SMILING)))! He, all nervous and hesitate, finally worked up the courage to say something along these lines, “I don’t know if this is appropriate or not; I don’t know how to ask this. But you are so cool (he likes to say that word, cool, and this word, fun). Can we spend time together on outings?” I said, “Sure!” I know me, and I still was feeling him out because this wasn’t just a “lunch meeting” anymore you know. He went on to mention that there was going to BE karaoke at The Loft at 11pm and I told him, “I need to BE coming in at that time BEcause I’m not single…I have children.” So, anyways, when I got home from this interview, I told my lads, “Umm, I don’t think that job is going to BE a good fit for me BEcause the owner kind of likes mom. And that is just not a good position to BE in as a worker.”
The next 30-days kept me on my P’s and Q’s (I think that’s how you say that). As it was, he was conclusive on day two, at Olive Garden, that I was the one for him. I on the other hand was like, “This IS NOT the purpose God has brought us together. And I needed to make sure that this…this which he knew…was of the LORD.” Okay, so how about there were GREEN FLAGS all along the journey and I fought it good and hard those 30-days BEcause of the way it was happening! (((Chuckling))) LORD, have mercy on me! I told him often, “I need to go pray!” And I did that daily BEcause I was feeling all sorts of ways! I needed to have the reassurance that he was right, and that I was not leaning to my own understanding, and that I was not being condemnatory due to my relationship experiences, and that I was not BEing prejudice against HOW the LORD was bringing to life my heart desires. SELAH!
There were many behaviors and life’s incidents that he shared with me that I was all too familiar with. Those things that are what we call “RED FLAGS.” Nonetheless, those flags did not outweigh the Godly good that I was admiring and they are not flags that we can’t conquer. Effusively encouraged, I know that we can BE Romans 8:37-38. The key distinction in all that was familiar to me is that Kris announced his love and what he said was ALWAYS in agreement with what he did. His words and his deeds were equally bonded and that unfamiliarity, the GREEN FLAGS, was a TITANTIC plus for me. After I consulted with my mother, my baby sister, Terrie Stone, and my son, Gerald Thomas, I kept right on praying. I knew in my heart that I couldn’t dismiss all the pleasant attributes that he had; the ones that I fervently desired from the LORD.
We had had several valuable discussions, hearty laughs, quiet moments of disappointments, some lack of understanding one another, some bumpy bumps that brought tears of sadness, hope, and joy all at the same time. He observed very accurately that I’m a tad “BOSSY” (it’s a pretty BOSSY though) and that I speak with…um, what’s that word he used? Oh yes, with authority. Don’t get it twisted though. I’m not usurping authority over him; I just speak kind and firm in what I know and BElieve and won’t back down from it. I finally understood why I tried to talk myself out of this; this which I have been preparing for and waiting for these last 10 years. There was only one reason I could identify during the 30-days, and that reason was the emotion called nervousness. I was so nervous about actually RECEIVING the desires that the LORD promised me when I BEcame Psalm 37:3-5; not to mention all that inspirations that swelled up in me (you can find them on Facebook). But Kris? OMGOSH! He wouldn’t GIVE IN to my nervousness as he would occasionally say with coolness, “You know we were meant to BE together right?” I’d answer him, “Is that right?” That answer has been replaced with, “Yes, I know!” I’m fully persuaded that 1 John 4:18 was alive BEcause there is no fear in love, and perfect love casteth out fear. The fear is gone! SELAH! Thank the LORD!
July 7, 2012, was the 31st day of our meeting and time of discovering one another (31: the number three is the signature of YAH and the number one means unity. The signature of YAH is up on this unity. I have no doubt whatsoever). It was also on this day, July 7, 2012, that I consulted with my lads (Gerald, Josue’, and Jordan), and my Gerald spoke with Kris in wholesome dialogue with careful instructions about Kris’ attention to me and his brothers. Josh, Jordan, and I talked about whether we should get an engagement ring or a commitment ring. I explained the difference to them and my Jordan, who was so happy and couldn’t stop those rosy cheeks from smiling, merrily said to me, “I think you all should take it slow and get a commitment ring since you all have only known each other for 30-days.” My Josue’ wasn’t sure how to express himself, but after he had talked to Gerald and me, he felt so much better and he too wanted us to go VERY S – L – O – W! This decision I simply couldn’t make by myself BEcause I am not a single woman. The results of every decision I make effects more than me; it affects my entire household. Thus, it was imperative that my lads had a say in their desire for this “New Life Transition” and how they would like for it to happen. We will all go through and make our choices together.
So, here we are in Kay’s Jewelers and I don’t know the first thing about purchasing a ring. All I know is that I know what I like. While browsing about like a little girl in a candy store (Kris is always telling me about that ‘dere candy store) I say to Kris, “Umm you never said how much I can spend?” He replies by shrugging his shoulders, and slightly tilting his head at the same time, and says, “It doesn’t matter.” (((In my Buck Wheat voice))) OOOO-TAY! So, hmmm…how about I’m not real good at making decisions in a candy store you know (((smiling))). Just as we were about to purchase one of the ones I liked but didn’t REALLY like, Kris says, “You REALLY like the other one don’t you? I like it too BEcause it sparkles more.” Well, of course I REALLY liked the other one, but I was very…what’s that word again…NERVOUS about the cost even after he said cost didn’t matter. SIDENOTE: I need to write about this i.e. cost isn’t an issue BEcause she is far above rubies! Well, I got just what I wanted; what I REALLY liked best and it was his kind joy to show his love for me. I receive!
Our Commitment is Our Pleasure: Kris and I are committed to (1) establishing a healthy relationship with one another in a Godly manner, (2) diligently and gently acknowledging areas that we can individually and collectively improve in, and working our faith to perfect those parts, (3) understanding one another by asking questions and not by making assumptions, (4) speaking words of life that will build one another up threefold and not tear down, and (5) discovering the needs of our children and grandchildren through this transition so that they are smoothly progressing with us as family!